Okay Ladies!!! So here where I test you to see just how open minded you really are. Are you familiar with the term “Sugaring”? Being a “Sugar Baby”? Having a “Sugar Daddy”? Odds are most of you have heard at least one of those terms. Well, yup, you guessed it…I have been and still am a sugar baby. Call me a whore, a slut, a gold digger, a prostitute, or my personal fave “Pretty Women” or whatever you like!! I own it all!! Yet the reality is that my experiences are some of the most AMAZING and GENUINE experiences of my life. Do you think I’m not the norm? Did you know that roughly 6.7 million (roughly 10%) of women between the ages of 18 -44 are or have been sugar babies in the past?
Interested yet??? Come take a little tour of sugaring through my experiences loves where I will share all of my advice, tips and etiquette to help guide you and make sure your sugar dating experiences (also known as “arrangements”) are as fun, fulfilling and safe as possible.
What is Sugaring or Being a Sugar Baby?
I like to think of being a sugar baby has a very evolved and mature way to date in the new age. Yet, there is something very traditional about a man taking care of his woman financially, physically and emotionally. But in more exact terms, it’s simply a dating arrangement between 2 parties where both parties benefit. Sometimes it’s as platonic as having a cup of coffee or lunch with a nice gentleman. Other times it’s some kind of dinner date or event he wants you to be his date for the evening. But more commonly, it is some sort of romantic interlude or an ongoing affair with a successful man. You take care of his needs…emotionally, socially,physically and he takes care of your needs. Your needs might be to date a successful man that can afford nice dinners, the best hotel suites and travel to exotic destinations. Or there might be more direct compensation such as gifts, or paying some of your expenses or an allowance. When it all works well, it feels very much like dating well off man of means and feeling taken care of in every way as a woman. Sure, not every arrangement is going to be perfect…but is every date a winner in the real world??
How I got into sugaring
Pssss….I met this older guy and….
So, back in college, I was hanging out with my roommate and one of her friends. We had a few drinks and we started asking her about her new Louis Vuitton bag and where she got it. At first she was a little evasive, but that made my friend and I even more curious. Suffice it to say that after a few more drinks and a lot of persuading, we were able to get the WHOLE story and all the DIRTY DETES out of her.
I used to masturbate to thoughts of my Perfect Sugar Daddy
When I heard about this whole other “under world” of sugaring, my naughty brain became ABSOLUTELY obsessed with it!! Could it really be true that you could date rich older men, be spoiled by them, have them take you out on dates, shopping, trips and also have amazing sex with them and yet not have to deal with the traditional woes of a “relationship”??? And I was already into older men anyway…they’re just so YUMMY!!! Ummm…yeah, this was something I wanted to explore deeper. I would honestly stay up late into the night fantasizing about my perfect sugar daddy. I would imagine our perfect date in some far off tropical location. I would fantasize about having amazing sex with him over and over in our luxury hotel suite overlooking the beach. And i would masturbate over and over again with that image in my naughty, perverted, sex-obsessed female brain.
Daddy Issues…HELL YES!!
I can honestly tell you that I had “daddy issues” from an early age. And it’s not because I had a bad father who ignored me or mistreated me or abandoned me. It was none of those things. My dad is an awesome man…a loving father…and excellent provider. He was always there for me throughout my life…even after he and my mom divorced. But to me, that made me even more attracted to a daddy figure in my life. Someone that I could ALWAYS count on. Someone that would ALWAYS take care of me and never abandon me. Someone that would spoil me…care about me….and love me no matter what I did. Someone confident, trustworthy and powerful. Does any of this sound familiar?? I think that what I love about my father and what I want in my sugar daddy are VERY VERY similar!! Minus the craven, depraved, naughty sexual desires of course LOL ??
Decided to try it myself
So, long story short…I decided to be bold and venture into this secret society. I setup a profile and very naively set out to find myself the perfect sugar daddy. Of course, as I’m sure you guessed, it wasn’t as easy as it seemed. There was quite a learning curve!! I quickly had to go from bright-eyed, eager-beaver to detective and gatekeeper to help me weed out the weirdos, psychos and scammers. I had to find a way to hone in on the “real” high-quality sugar daddies that were after the same thing I wanted. But after a few misfires, I was able to find an AMAZING sugar daddy!! We would meetup regularly, go out to nice places, go shopping and even went on some AMAZING trips together. We still keep in touch to this day and I consider him a very special person in my life.
Post Divorce….I’m Seeking Again
Yup, that’s right. What worked for me in my college days is still working for me in my early 30’s. And while yes, there are a few more miles on my body now…there is also a wealth of experience that makes it SO MUCH EASIER for me to find the perfect guy now. In fact, my success rate with dates is crazy good thanks to years of figuring out just what to look for. And now, I’m here to share it all with you.
Why it turns me on
I love it when guys spoil me…financially, physically, emotionally and YES SEXUALLY
Well, this seems so obvious to me. But who doesn’t want a guy that can spoil them financially?? Someone who can afford those nice dinners out? Someone to buy that extravagant dress you’ve been drooling over (oh, and the matching shoes!!) and can whisk me away to some amazing far off destination on a whim?? Who doesn’t want a guy who is confident?? Knows what he’s doing in the bedroom? Craves to spoil every inch of your body and make you feel so sexy and be that strong, dominant, alpha-male that knows how to please a woman?? Or, ladies, perhaps you are happy with these clueless, poor fuck boys. You know, these guys that drink too much, would rather hangout with their guy friends, don’t give a shit about pleasing you in bed. Do they even know how to please a woman? And do they even have the finances to support a wonderful upscale girl like yourself with dreams, ambition, fantasies?? Life is short ladies…how do you want to spend your time??
I love having sex with new people
Ok, it’s time for some more name calling…get your street vocabulary ready girls!! I love LOVE LOVE having sex with new people. Yup, slut, whore, freak, hedonist, pervert, nympho!!! Yep, that’s me and I’m not apologizing to anyone about it. But this is a different world ladies. For eons, guys have been using women to get what they want…is it so awful that I’m trying to get what I want?? And I’m not being dishonest about it…quite the opposite. I’m being 100% forthright with the guys I meet about what my expectations are of them and myself. And I don’t step into this as some emotionless sex robot. I have genuine relationships, with real, caring men. We go into it with our eyes wide open about our expectations. To me, it’s like a mini-marriage…or as I sometimes call it “The honeymoon without the marriage.” ?? And YES, I have a kink for rich, older, smart, handsome, sexy and naughty gentlemen that take care of me. Can you blame me??
My Top 5 “Sugar” Experiences
South Beach Weekend Getaway ?
This was my first ever trip with a sugar daddy. He was sweet, and fun, and sexy and naughty in all the best ways. We stayed in this AMAZING suite and the most HIP & TRENDY hotel in South Beach. He paid for the entire trip, meals out, clubs, cabanas by the pool, shopping. It was SOOO romantic, and fun and truly magical. We went clubbing, drank WAY TOO MUCH and had romantic dinners in the most INCREDIBLE restaurants! But none better than Gianni Versace’s mansion in South Beach. We even took salsa dancing lessons together. Truly one of the best weekends of my life. And the HOT ?, drunken, Latin-infused sexual energy fueled some pretty epic sexcapades that weekend. Let’s just say we both left both satisfied..but hungry for more.
Sex Slave Unicorn ?
One of my first sugar experiences was as a unicorn with this sexy couple. They were the most normal, sweet, down-to-earth couple you could imagine. They had kids and a house in the suburbs. But they also had a naughty side and wanted me to be their sexy unicorn to join them in bed. I was only too happy to oblige. They had lots of naughty sex toys. They would tie me up with bed restraints, blindfold me and just devour and play with every inch of my body. I have never felt so desired, sexy, orgasmic and turned on all at once. With the two of them having their way with me and me blindfolded, I never knew who was where…what was coming next. Or where it was going to come from. I was forced to lie back and take it all in…and not fight it. To submit to their carnal desires. And just let my feminine lust take over and ride the wave of orgasm after mind-bending, toe-curling orgasm. Not a bad way to earn a few extra $$$.
Hawaii 5-OHHHHH ?♂️
For my 24th birthday, my sugar daddy took me to Hawaii to celebrate. Just the gesture alone nearly made me cry as I grew up without a lot and never had the means to travel to any place like Hawaii. He planned the entire trip for us. We stayed in a suite on Waikiki beach with wraparound views of the beach and of Diamond Head. We had our own private adult pool. We did everything from Luaus, to parasailing, to relaxing days on the beach or tanning by the pool, to waverunners to snorkeling and so much more. One day, he rented a jeep and we drove around the entire island stopping at these little private, intimate beaches that only the locals know about. The last night he bought me a Louis Vittion bag for my birthday and we went out to celebrate at a Japanese Teppanyaki Steakhouse (which is my fav).
Climaxing in the Mile High City ?
My sugar daddy had a business meeting in Denver in November. He invited me to come along so that we could spend the down time together when he wasn’t working. We had this AMAZING corner suite at this upscale, boutique hotel in downtown with wraparound views of the city lights and mountains. IT WAS UNBELIEVABLY SCENIC!!! I’m sure Denver doesn’t sound too exciting to some of you…but the romance level was through the roof. First of all, it was cold but between the red wine, crazy hot sex and snuggling up to him in bed we managed to generate our sexy heat ? . When we woke up the first morning, it was snowing outside. It was the most beautiful scene I could have ever imagined through our floor-to-ceiling wraparound windows. He would go off to his meetings and I would go have a mimosa brunch and make friends at the bar. Each time he would come back we would have the craziest, naughtiest, sexiest and most passionate encounters. Wow believe me when I tell you that this guy REALLY knew how to please a woman!! (pro tip ladies: Older guys REALLY know how to treat and to please a woman.) WOW…just recounting this tale is getting me a little hot and bothered ?
New Year’s Ski Trip in Tahoe ❄
I had been dating one of my sugar daddies for almost 6 months. We wanted to plan something fun to do for New Years to ring in the new year together and to celebrate our VERY successful relationship. My sugar daddy came up with this awesome idea to whisk me away for a 5 day ski trip to Tahoe over New Years!!! I was BEYOND THRILLED!!! We spent an entire weekend shopping for the clothes we needed. The trip itself was nothing short of magical…the scenery, beauty of the lake, the mountains, the ski resorts and village was not short of other worldly. He paid for everything, as usual, from ski apparel, to private ski lessons. From a beautiful sunset tour on an ATV at the top of the mountain to romantic dinners out. We went to this INCREDIBLE outdoor rave in the snow and the after parties. And the late night drunken sex in the hotel room was incredible. It felt like a honeymoon!!! Just the two of us with no cares or worries in the world. Ahhhhh….
How I do it….My advice based on years of experience
Good Daddies…make GREAT Sugar Daddies!!!
It shouldn’t be any surprise that men who have children and who are good fathers make GREAT sugar daddies. And BONUS points if they have girls. They are generally sweet and their natural instinct is to love and nurture and spoil their sugar baby just as they would spoil their own daughter(s). And the other HUGE advantage is that if they are truly good dads, the are almost certainly good people too. To see if they are good fathers, just observe the way they talk about their kids, checkout their social media pics with their kids and the pics they send you. It’s pretty easy to tell which dads are close to their kids and which ones aren’t. And if they are good dads, it means that I already feel SO MUCH SAFER and comfortable and AT-EASE around them than any non-family guy. Bottom line…”Good Daddies make GREAT Sugar Daddies”.
Hard Working Businessmen Make Better Daddies than Independently Wealthy Assholes
Here’s a hard truth that took me years to learn. Generally speaking (and contrary to what you might think) the men with the most money are NOT the guys who make the best sugar daddies. Guys who are independently wealthy and don’t really have to work for anything just become rich assholes. They just want to throw money at everything and treat women like a commodity you would buy at a grocery store. EWWWW!!!! Now that is not why I got into sugaring. What I look for is a BUSINESSMAN!! A guy who works hard, makes good money, has people skills, is ambitious and REALLY enjoys having a sugar baby there to tend to his needs. A man who wants to blow off steam by having CRAZY HOT PASSIONATE SEX, spoiling their baby and taking her on exotic trips together from time to time. Remember, it’s not ALL about how much money they have in their bank account. It’s also about the kind of person they are, how they treat other people and how much fun they are and like to have.
Are they Normal??
This one might seem very obvious, but it is THE most important thing to look for in a sugar daddy.
The Normal Test:
- Are they evasive when you ask them questions? Are they hiding something?
- If you ask them for pics, or to talk or to FaceTime, do they make excuses?
- Are they communicative? Can they carry on a conversation that is interesting without you pushing them or trying too hard? Are they intelligent?
- Do they seem sexy? Or do they seem creepy? This is a fine line. But, ideally you want a guy that is fun, outgoing, good conversationalist in the early stages. They shouldn’t be ALL ABOUT GETTING IN YOUR PANTS…YET. And then as you get to know them, they get sexier, and naughtier. But there has to be that natural, fun, sexy progression…like dating on fast forward. Some guys get this…and others are clueless.
- If you have ever done a job interview, you might think of the early stages of getting to know a guy like an interview. Is this a guy you would work with? Is this a guy you could hang out with for long periods of time? Can you see yourself becoming friends with this guy? Again dating, but on fast forward.
Avoid these red flags?
- Asks you for any kind of money or financial information. REAL sugar daddies NEVER do this
- Wants to skip all the “getting to know you” and just have you come over to their house
- Becomes evasive about any question you ask him…what is he hiding?
- Inconsistent narrative. If you catch him contradicting himself, this probably means he is lying
- Does not want to be forthcoming about their relationship status, family status, work status, living status. Real sugar daddies are usually more than happy to share it all with you. You’ll feel better knowing their full story so that you understand their motivations.
Over the years, I’ve learned that you really have to spend some time screening guys to find a good sugar daddy. And the most efficient way to do that is what I call the “fast fail” technique. This essentially means that if this is not going to work out, then you want to know as quickly as possible. And to the contrary, if this is going to work out, then you want to know that quickly too. To do this, you need to go through a progression with a guy that usually goes something like this:
1 – INITIAL EXCHANGE
Some quick messages on the website you met them on. Checkout their profile and make sure there is nothing alarming. One thing I ALWAYS look for is to see if they are verified through a photo, through social media and have a background verification check done. If they have those 3 things and I’m attracted to them, then I’m moving on to stage 2 right away.
2 – TEXTING
Some people prefer snapchat or other texting apps, but I prefer plain old texting for a few reasons:
- Most people have an iphone these days, which means they probably have iMessage which already tells you it’s a real phone and not an anonymous number
- Does the guy’s area code match the location they say they are from. It’s not a bit deal if it doesn’t, but if it does it’s another positive sign.
- Now we can easily move on to FaceTime if it goes that far
So, the goal of texting for me is to start to get their personality down. Do the normal test, the evasive test, the job interview…see what this guy is all about and what he’s looking for. Has he been a sugar daddy before? What are his intentions or goals with his relationship with you?
3 – FaceTime/Video Chat/Voice
While I don’t always do this step, this is an important one if you have any doubts. Now you can hear his voice. See if he looks like his pics in real life. See how well his conversation matches his text messages. See the place he lives. Pro Tip: Ask him for a virtual tour of his home…you can find out a lot about a guy by seeing where he lives.
4 – MEET IN PERSON
And if we pass all of the above steps, it’s time for the final one…MEET IN PERSON. I generally recommend that you meet a guy in a public place for the first time…even if it’s just a coffee shop for a quick cup of coffee. Again, if he wants to avoid this step, it’s a red flag. A good sugar daddy will ALWAYS want you to be comfortable and will cater to your needs when it comes to being safe. So this is the final step, you already know this guy pretty well by now. Does he come off in person the same way? How is his non-verbal communication? Is he strong? Confident? Sexy? Not pushy? Into you too? Not spending all his time texting or playing on his phone while he’s with you. Remember, what you see now is a microcosm of what it will be like when you guys are alone together.
Becoming a sugar baby isn’t for everyone. There will always be people who prefer the old fashioned dating life. To hold on to romantic notions of dating, engagement, marriage and “happily ever after”. And I applaud you ladies…seriously, do what works for you. But for some of us, being a sugar baby is just a very natural alternative to traditional dating. One where we all lay our cards on the table, find something that works and everyone wins. You get the help you need financially, you get spoiled and feel special, you go on romantic getaways. You have that emotional, financial and physical/sexual person that you very much need and want in your life. And him… Well, he gets you!!! And all of your energy, vibrance and sexiness. ? LUCKY GUY!!! I don’t know about you, but it sounds like a WIN/WIN to me. having experienced many successful arrangements, I know for a fact this can work for the right 2 people.
For more information and tips, I also found this site to be INCREDIBLY helpful with good sugaring advice: